It doesn’t matter what culture you belong to, when it comes to beauty, or outward appearance vs. inward worth. It is easy to get carried away by the surface of things. We often judge one another solely based on appearances. If someone looks good, we assume they’re good.
In Mandarin Chinese we have a special phrase that embodies this whole way of thinking.
The phrase is: “绣花枕头 (xiùhuā zhěntóu).”
What does it mean?
“绣花枕头 (Xiùhuā zhěntóu)” is actually a pillow, with an embroidered case. For us in China, we know that although a pillow might look beautiful on the outside. It could just be filled with straw on the inside, which means it wouldn’t be a very comfortable pillow. And therefore it would be a bit deceiving. Who wants to rest their head on straw? We use this to show that looks can be deceiving. And you can’t always judge a book by its cover. A person may look beautiful on the outside, but not have a heart and mind to match.
Is this Chinese phrase positive or negative?
This word has a negative connotation. In daily conversation we don’t necessarily use it seriously. We tend to use it when joking around one another, maybe in a group setting where everyone is acting casually and is laid-back. If you use it too seriously you really might hurt someone’s feelings.
When should I use this phrase?
You can use this when describing people you are a bit suspicious of. Here’s a good social example of when you could use it:
Anna’s mother doesn’t like Anna’s new attractive boyfriend. She often says Anna’s boyfriend is a “绣花枕头 (Xiùhuā zhěntóu).”
What do you think? Does Anna’s mother approve of her new boyfriend?
The answer would be no! Anna’s mother is suspicious that although he is attractive on a physical level, he is somewhat empty emotionally and mentally.
More Examples:
Mark jiùshì gè shénme dōu bù huì zuò de xiùhuā zhěntou.
Mark就是个什么都不会做的绣花枕头。
Mark is an outwardly attractive but actually empty person.
Zánmen gōngsī lǐ de xiùhuā zhěntou tài duōle.
咱们公司里的绣花枕头太多了。
There are many outwardly attractive but actually useless people in our company.
There are more words in Mandarin Chinese that have a similar connotation.
For example: “花瓶.”
花瓶 (Huāpíng): this word literally means flower vase; vase. But we also use it to describe women who look impressive but lack genuine depth (good looks without an intellect and heart to match).
Example:
Bùyào yīnwèi wǒ de wàibiǎo jiù bǎ wǒ dàngchéng yígè huāpíng.
不要因为我的外表就把我当成一个花瓶。
Don't treat me as a vase just because of my appearance.
Quiz:
1. Read the dialogue below and answer the question:
Tony: Wǒ bù xǐhuān hé Jason yìqǐ gōngzuò.
Tony: 我不喜欢和Jason一起工作。
Anna: Wèishénme ya?
Anna: 为什么呀？
Tony: Tā jiùshì gè xiùhuā zhěntou, shénme dōu gān bùliǎo.
Tony: 他就是个绣花枕头，什么都干不了。
Which of the following statements is true according to the dialogue?
A. Tony doesn’t like working with Jason because Jason often takes his embroidered pillow.
B. Tony doesn’t like working with Jason because Jason is outwardly attractive but actually a useless person.
C. Tony likes working with Jason because Jason has an embroidered pillow.
D. Tony likes working with Jason because Jason is a hard-worker.
